Life’s biggest challenge: folding fitted sheets?

Published 2:50 am Wednesday, January 31, 2018

“It is the biggest challenge you will have in your life.”

That is what the woman in the video said. I wasn’t sure it was my greatest life challenge, but hey, she seemed to know and who am I to argue.

Let me back up and say I am a sucker for these kinds of videos. They pop up on social media or while I scroll through some website. I can’t resist seeing what miracles they have to show me.

I learned amazing things. I discovered 12 clever uses of dollar store cooling racks and what you can do with a paper towel roll once the paper towels are gone.

In addition, I know how to get the stink out of towels when washing alone doesn’t do it. Same goes for ridding the washing machine of odors.

I admit the eight ways to finally end kitchen clutter forever stretched the idea of creatively reusing stuff. Covering an empty cardboard box with decorative paper glued on in layers and then using it as storage seemed like a lot of work for little return. (And it was kind of tacky too).

I felt the same about spray-painted green bean cans and whimsical hand soap dispensers make from Coke bottles. You can get hand soap in a whimsical dispenser for $1. That’s less than the cost of the Coke and you still have to buy the soap to fill the whimsical soda bottle soap dispenser.

Did you know you could organize your chicken noodle soup by covering the box that holds cans of Cokes with more of that decorative paper? I’ve never had a soup organization issue, but it’s good to know how to handle it should it arise.

I am anxious to see if baby powder solves the ant problem in my home — when I have an ant problem. The guy in the video promised me no more ants, but he did warn me not to let humans eat the powder. Thank goodness he said this because I was considering scarfing down a big spoonful of the stuff.

Then there were seven tips for cleaning my germ-filled mattress. Six ways to keep my carpet looking new. Eight useful tips to solve your toilet issues. (These, I think, were about cleaning and not about issues related to sitting on the toilet. I didn’t actually watch the video).

Five powerful methods for cleaning your drain, seven teeny areas in your home you should clean, nine amazing ways to use tension rods … there are so many videos filled with such important information. I simply do not have enough time or fast enough internet speed to discover the seven surprising uses for witch hazel.

I did, however, make time to find out about that biggest challenge in life. I mean if it’s the biggest challenge and this woman has a video to solve it, I’m in.

What is that challenge, the one we all face? The one we’ve struggled with for years?

It’s the all-important, only correct, secretly hidden for eons way to fold a fitted sheet. Yes, that’s the challenge that vexes humans more than any other according to the woman about to show me how to fold that fitted sheet.

First, she demonstrated how problematic it is to cram an unfolded fitted sheet into a linen closet. It’s downright traumatic to pull out an incorrectly folded sheet. I had no idea how much trauma is in my life because of this one issue.

It was a miraculous thing to see the ease with which she put corner to corner to middle to side and boom — a perfectly neat square of folded fitted sheet. Man’s biggest challenge in life solved.

Well, not quite. I tried to do what I thought she did. My results were not good and I can’t find that darn video.

Alas, I have not conquered life’s biggest challenge. Think I’ll comfort myself by checking out seven ways aluminum foil will make my life better.

 

Nancy Blackmon is a former newspaper editor and a yoga teacher.