Could Wii be talking about Mii?

Published 12:00 am Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Women and their weight generally isn’t a topic open for discussion. But I’m going to come clean…my Wii Fit told me I was fat.

Boy, oh boy. I knew that I needed to tone up some, but fat? The little weight indicator hovering between overweight and obese was proof of the fact.

The concept behind the add-on to the Nintendo gaming system is a simple one designed to get people off the couch and moving. I knew I needed to be one of those people. With a full time job, three kids, softball, t-ball, church and did I mention work, I’m hard pressed to find time to sleep, let alone exercise.

I had made valiant efforts in the past to do better for my physical self. I bought a mat and cute exercise pants and attempted yoga. When I arrived at the class, the teacher began by explaining all about relaxation techniques and finding inner peace, but what they didn’t tell me was that I couldn’t talk at yoga.

By the end of the class, my body felt relaxed, but my head was about to explode and I knew exactly how an ADHD kindergartner felt at the end of story time.

That was my first and last yoga class.

Next on my list was this Zumba class that everyone is talking about. I was so enthusiastic about it I recruited my mother to drive from Florala to Andalusia just so I wouldn’t have to take it by myself – plus I’d have someone to talk to.

I had heard other people talk about the class, which according to the website, “fuses hypnotic Latin rhythms and easy-to-follow moves to create a one-of-a-kind fitness program that feature interval training sessions where fast and slow rhythms and resistance training are combined to tone and sculpt your body while burning fat. Add some Latin flavor and international zest into the mix and you’ve got a Zumba® class.”

So I bought some new shoes and got ready to channel my inner Shakira.

Unfortunately, all the other Shakira’s beat us there, and I liked to have gotten my eye punched out the class was so full. So, we left, and that’s how I came to be standing on the white balance board watching the green dots as my body mass index was calculated and my weight popped up.

Turned out, too, that I was fat and 40, because apparently the game also calculates your “fitness age.” And it was no less hurtful coming from the weird iRobot voice than if it had come straight from the lips of any member of the opposite sex. Combine that with the droopy shoulders of my “Mii” character, and it was enough to make me want to gorge myself with chocolate mint ice cream – which, incidentally, I didn’t have any because I’m on this stupid diet. That in turn made me mad and gave me enough energy to accomplish day 2’s 30 minutes of aerobics and strength training. It was fun, which was exactly what the Wii folks were going for, I think.

It was enough fun that then and there I made a commitment to myself – I was going to do this for myself so that by the time I actually turned 40, I would be fabulous.

So watch out ladies, make room. My mom, my new shoes and I are headed back to Zumba tonight.